Sunday, March 30, 2008

Any New Posts?

I have been a blog and internet board follower for many, many years. It's funny how through one blog, you get connected to another blog and soon you are following many lives through the internet world. I also know that when I visit a blog, I hope to see a new post. Many times I click on "Bump on the Road" and absent-mindedly hope to see a new post. But then I think, just who would post that? That'd be me. And I have a touch of melancholy. I miss the surprise of seeing a new post on "Bump on the Road". The things I have discovered that bring a flash of sadness....

Many of you tell me that you still visit the site and I am glad that you care for us and our grief. Quite honestly, I personally have been feeling very low lately. Things are settling, change is occuring, sorrow grows and grief is heavy. Sometimes it feels like I'll never see the light of day again. Another holiday has come and gone and I can't help but reflect on the carefree days of 5 years ago, or 3 years ago even. I grieve. We grieve.

I have been reading through many of Annette's files this past while. I feel close to her when I read them, like we're having a conversation. I can hear her voice like she is beside me. I also feel much sorrow when I read them. I think I will leave the files for the time-being.

She had written her own obituary. We hadn't found it before (it was on her laptop and not on the home computer). I think we did it justice, but there were a few lines that she had written herself that we hadn't included:

"Annette was a chartered accountant but had spent the past 3 ½ years at home taking care of her beloved children. She enjoyed spending time with her family and before her illness, volunteering with the Down syndrome community.

Please come rejoice with us as we celebrate Annette’s triumphant return to the Lord. Her faith was a source of great comfort to her and she received great strength by knowing that her God carried her in his hands throughout her illness."

Triumphant. What a great word! And I'm sure it was... triumphant.

Amen, Annette. I will carry those last 2 senteces with me throughout this week.

9 comments:

Mendelt said...

Lisa:

Your post was touching. I read both pleasure and pain. I guess that is the road one must travel.

Triumphant. Cool.

It was good to see you on Saturday. I wish you peace,

All 4 My Gals said...

Lisa,

I have prayed for your sister daily since she became ill. I miss her so much! Please know that now you are in my prayers. I can not imagine how much you miss her! HUGS and prayers for you!

Anonymous said...

Yes, Triumphant, indeed. I love being able to read Annette's words in this blog.

Kei said...

Triumphant. Wow. That is so Annette.

I still think of her daily, and I do visit the blog often. I hold you in my prayers Lisa, as well as Tom and the boys.
Love & Hugs~

Anonymous said...

Thanks so much for this and all of your posts... it means so much to read your thoughts through this journey... we miss Annette too...
Jen

Anonymous said...

Lisa:
I too visit Annette's blog on a regular basis, I like to re-read her entries, they were full of passion and courage. She was truly a wonderful woman.

There will come a day when Annette's passing will not be the first thing you think of when you awaken or the last before you fall asleep. It will just happen but it will take time.

We pray that this time will come soon and that your grief will not be such a heavy burden.

Thank you for keeping in touch,

Jennifer

Jan Steck Huffman said...

I just want to thank you. Thank you for continuing to be here for Annette, and most of all, for us.

We all miss her so, but know that our sorrow can't be close to yours and your Dad's, and Tom's and the boys. But know we are here.

I wonder if we could guest host this blog. Sometimes to post something that was close to us, that brought Annette and family near? That might help you a bit, and us.

Just a thought. You know where to find us! hugs and love to you and the "men".

Jan

Anonymous said...

Lisa,

I'm glad you have continued to write in Annette's blog. I miss her and I can't imagine how much you miss your sister. You are in my prayers. Please take one day at a time. We will be here for you every step of the way.
(((HUGS)))
Shawn

Anonymous said...

Lisa - Wow - I am in tears - only Annette could make her exit so beautiful by calling it triumphant! Wow - yes I too will keep this in my head forever.

I keep you and your family and Tom and the boy's in my prayers! I can only imagine how difficult the grief can be - I see it firsthand through the family I live with now, yet they hold in a lot as well. I pray for peace and comfort for the days ahead.

I too miss her posts, but, come here now to read yours and you are an inspiration as your sister was!

Thank you for keeping this up - I know Annette is smiling on you!

Hugs!

Lisa - Lily's mom from T21